OK, now this is the funniest thing I've seen since that tragedy of an election earlier this week:
Marry An American
It might take a try or two to get through, as the site is getting HAMMERED with visitors and seem to be exceeding their capabilities. As satirical as it is, if you go to the View Pledges page, there are hundreds of pledges already, and don't forget to check out the Aboot page! Har Har Har!
On a side note, I'm available again now.